Monday, April 30, 2012

Let's Imagine For A Moment......

You have a friend that you have been friends with forever and you care about her deeply!! You guys have been friends for 30 years and for 20 of those 30 years, you friend has been a functioning alcoholic. You watched as your friend went to work and went to school and maintained her family but you knew that behind closed doors, she got drunk as a skunk. She needed alcohol the minute she woke up, she needed alcohol to sleep, and on special occasions she needed even more alcohol. You worried about your friend but you didn't say anything because you didn't want to hurt her feelings. Finally, your friend found out she was having a baby!! How exciting! But she didn't want to set this example for her child. She immediately joined an AA group and has been sober for 18 months. You must be such a proud friend!! Now, she's sober, she's living the healthy life and maintaining it but you know her skeletons. You know that she still has a weakness for alcohol. 20 years is a long time to be addicted to something to just forget about it in 18 months! Being the good friend that you are, you continue to show your support and tell her how proud you are every day.
Now I have a question.....

She got promoted at her job this week, which only calls for a celebration!! CHAMPAGNE!!!......Do you offer your friend champagne? Do you tell her that she deserves it and she worked hard? Do you tell her to let loose and enjoy herself once in a while reassuring her that it's okay to overindulge and it's only one time? Then the next time a celebration comes up, hand her another glass telling her the same thing? And the next time? And the next? How many "Only one times" can there be??

Hello, my name is Krystle and I am a recovering food addict.

I am sending out a plea to my friends and family. I know that you are all super proud of me. I know that you think that sometimes I think too much about weight loss and counting points and you think that offering me a 2nd piece of cake or telling me I don't have to workout today and should take it easy sounds nice. But I ask that you think of me as a recovering addict from any other drug and treat me as such. When you push food on me telling me that it's just one time, it enables me. When you tell me how great I look and a 2nd piece of cake won't hurt me, you're wrong. It won't hurt me that one time, maybe but the next week when someone else tells me the same thing, that enables me and makes me let my guard down. And week after week and event after event of letting my guard down could very easily pack the pounds back on someone like me.

Many of you have seen me struggle with my weight for a good portion of my life and just because I have changed my ways in the past year and a half, doesn't take away from the 22 years that I ate when I was happy, ate when I was sad, ate when I was angry, ate because it was time to eat, ate to put me to sleep, and so on.

When I was still 200+lbs I heard "You look great, keep up the great work". Now, I hear way too often "You look great...stop losing weight....you need to eat something."  I am pleading with the people who love me to continue to show the same support at 152lbs that you showed me at 250lbs. This goes for friends that I know as well as friends that I have never met. This is STILL a struggle for me and will continue to be something I will have to overcome but with your support and my determination, I will succeed.

As always, I love you all dearly and thank you for the daily support you show me!! xoxo

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Brilliantly put!! God Bless and keep up the good work. You are an inspiration to me and so many others. xox

Unknown said...

I love this blog. I need this too! I have so much support now but I need it until the very end of the journey and through maintenance which some people have a hard time sticking around for.

I get scared that I will get to a healthier weight and people will say 'oh you're fine. you dont need to lose any more weight'. I don't think that's fair. Just because I'm not AS obese, doesn't mean I should stop.

People think that if you go from being obese to being average sized that you are "too skinny" When someone is already very thin and they always have been its no big deal. Maybe its the shock factor and the comparison that makes people think this way.

I want to lose ALL the weight. Some people have told me "you only need to lose 15 more lbs and you will look great" but its not about them thinking I look great. Its about getting a HEALTHY weight with a healthy lifestyle and that weight is still at the very least 45lbs away.

I will definitely be sharing this blog with anyone in the future who tells me to stop losing weight before Im at my healthy goal. You rock.

xx.
bail

Jen said...

VERY well said. Kudos to you. I've learned, first during my struggle with infertility and now with my weight, that I can't count on everyone around me for support. While I haven't "banned" people from my life, I have had to choose who I share my journey with and who I talk with about it when I do need support.

I applaud you for posting this! Keep up the great work!

Anonymous said...

I love this post. I totally know what you are going through. My husband always says "you can have one candy bar, you have lots of points". Little does he know that candy bar is a downhill slide. You are doing amazing and are an inspiration to me.

safire said...

Great way to let people understand different perspectives. People don't take food addiction as seriously and they should!

Lisa said...

Hi I'm Lisa and I also am a food addict!! Thank you Krystle!!

Barbara Finley said...

OMG! That was so well said! I think so many of us have felt the same way and not had the nerve to say it! Thank You!!! Thank You!!!

Tere said...

Like they say, the first step to succeeding and recovering is to admit the problem. It is hard sometimes to keep ahead of everything and one wrong word can spin you, but you can do it. I have been following your blog and you inspire me. You are doing so well and I am proud of you. Keep it up. You are strong and you can do it.
Tere

Eternnitty89 said...

God I want to say thank you for all your blogs! Reading this touched so close to my heart and I want you to know that I appreciate you and all you stand for and enjoy reading and learning more from you with every word that you write! I am going through the same thing and have been for a long time and taking it day by day and am learning so much as I go about myself and the things I have to overcome to be the happy person I've always dreamed of! thank you so much!

Caroline said...

I'm not sure if I have more haters or likers since I've lost weight. I hear "are you still trying to lose weight?" or "are you sick?" "how much more do you plan to lose?"....My MIL thinks my hubby and I have lost too much sometimes...and my side of the famiy have yet to give me a compliment...and I've lost 30lbs on WW. I was 161 lbs when I joined last May and around Christmas I reached my goal of 135lbs. Last Sept. I ran my first 5k, in April I climbed the CN Tower in 21 minutes and this May I will be running my first 10K...all I would like to hear is you've done great...thats all.

Unknown said...

That's such a good perspective to look at it from!! Most people don't see it that way they see food as a necessity and to me I think that's what makes it worse and so much harder.

Law4715 said...

OMG This blog is SO true. I have been down and unmotivated for the past few weeks. I even cried last night about feeling overwhelmed about it all but this blog is definitely lifting me up.

Teresa Halminton said...

Thank you for the honest answer. I agree with you. If I care about my friend deeply, I won't never let her touch a bottle again. I'm the kind of person who may say bitter words to my friends if they are wrong.
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