Saturday, October 1, 2011

You know what I feel guilty for??

I had a completely OFF plan day and I am okay with that. I am on track and focused 99.9% of my life and I just wanted a day so I took it! I had pizza and a cheese steak and drank chocolate milk and ate 2 Oreos and you know what the crazy part is???? I don't feel guilty for today.......I feel guilty for eating like that EVERY day for most of my life prior to Weight Watchers. I feel guilty that I treated my body so badly day in and day out for so long. I feel guilty that I didn't feel guilty THEN. I feel guilty for eating those things and not working out the next day or drinking 100oz of water to flush it all out. I feel guilty that I completely neglected my one and only, God given, body for as long as I was old enough to make my own decisions. THAT's what I feel guilty about.

Yea, I enjoyed my cheese tasted wonderful and was worth every one of those 40 points but I could never eat like this day in and day out and I am sooo happy that I feel that way. Eating the way I did today did not make me miss the "old days" one just reminded me of why I can never, ever, ever, every, EVER go back to my old habits and it motivated me even more to be completely 150% focused tomorrow and the rest of the week. 

I'm not going back here...
and that's my word. 

Onward and downward!!

In other news... I lost 1.6 this week and I'm down a total of 82.4lbs! Holla!! :D It feels wonderful...really, really, really wonderful. I am so close to goal I can taste it tastes 10,000x better than cheese steak!! 

Update on my family:: My step dad is rockin' the program down 8.4 in two weeks!  My mom is down 5.8 and my grandfather is down 3.6! I am so proud of all of them and I just love seeing them 1st thing Saturday mornings! 

When my good friend Nicole reached her 100lbs mark I was just beginning my journey. She was featured in a magazine where she talked about how her fiance told her that he felt like he was with another woman and I remember crying my eyes out thinking about how crazy that must feel for Nicole and how I so wished I could feel that feeling. WELL....this morning I was getting ready to leave for my WW meeting and my honey said to me "Babe, you look like a completely different person!!" ....ya'll know I had to hold back the tears!!! I said " that a good thing??" and he said "yess definitely". I love that he appreciates me for all that I am and all that I have to offer whether it comes with 250+ pounds or 170lbs. 

September 2009
Today - 10/1/11

OH..I can't believe I almost forgot to mention!!! Did you guys watch Dr. Oz on Monday??! I'm sure if you're a WW member you did. 1st of all: MY STEPHANIE (my WW leader) WAS ON THERE!!! andd....they cut her interview segment out! I was so super duper upset but she's so silly and totally made up for it today at our meeting. If you watched it - she was on the panel of 4 leaders in the beginning but she was the last one that they cut to commercial before they talked to her. Punks!! Anyway, if you don't already know, Dr. Oz is giving away a million dollars this year to someone who transforms their life. So get with it! Get on it! Sign up! Check it out here.

What they were SUPPOSED to ask Stephanie was "What made you join Weight Watchers?" and "What keeps you motivated to remain a Weight Watchers member?" and her answer to both was "Pain". She was in a wheel chair from terrible back pain when she joined and let me tell you....she's not in a wheel chair anymore!! You should see her jump around our meeting in her heels and all!! She is a true inspiration and real life proof that not only does weight watchers WORK it can be about way more than just looking better.

So my question to you is WHAT MOTIVATES YOU?? Whether you are a Weight Watchers member or you do another weight loss plan, what keeps you motivated to keep on pushing??

My answer???

My best friend. 

She will never experience the things I experienced being the "Fat Kid" and I can promise you that. It starts with me. I swear on my life that I will never go back to the picture I posted at the top because of this little girl right here. She deserves the world and that includes a healthy and active mother to run, jump, and play with for as long as God will allow my body to do so. 

Nothing is impossible. The word itself says "I'm Possible" - Audrey Hepburn

What is your motivation?


its_ashley said...

i wrote this whole long as comment as to my im motivated.. and the stupid thing wouldnt work. ugh but basically i wana flat tummy now, and i want to be able to go to victorias secret and get sexy bras instead of cacique bras (hopefully i can go down to a D(ish) i wont go too small cuz my family has big boobs (lol)) and wen anthony grabs my hips i want it to be my hips and not the extra fat, im tired of trying to shop and things dont fit rite, and im tired of wearing my tummy sucker in thing (lol to what i call it). i dont leave the house without wearing it... and during the summer it makes me hotter.. blah so im excited to have have to wear it anymore.. i do it for me, to make me feel better about myself. thanks like always for sharing, reading ur blog makes me feel 10000x more motivated! (made sure to copy this time just incase lol)

Unknown said...

I think we all have different motivations but im pretty sure having a daughter is a great one. For me its my nephew, being able to chase after him, to give him a positive role model in his life when it comes to food, to be able to wear normal clothes, to not get so hot in summer because of my weight, to be able to exercise etc without being out of breath, to be able to cross my legs properly, to feel more confident, to not be so tired so easily, to be healthy and not have to worry so much.

whatever the reasons, its reminding yourself every day of them that keeps us going and having inspirational people to chat too. I.e yourself. You have done fantastic and I hope i am able to do as well.

Ashley said...

You are so awesome girl. aren't those guilt free days fantastic?? I feel the same way you do...I don't feel guilty about those once in a blue moon pizza days..i feel guilty for doing it every day for 23 years. Yay for life changing revelations!

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