A little self reflection

Hey there :)

I haven't really blogged in quite some time...I've done giveaways and guest posts and that sort of thing but I haven't spent time writing a genuine blog in a while.... I think it's time.

I get told often that the reason people enjoy my page is because I keep it real about the struggle .. I've always been 100% transparent when it comes to my journey and always will be. With that being said, I can't count on all my fingers (and maybe even my toes) how many times I have said to myself (and to you guys!) "I over did it tonight" or "I ate too much ______" and kicked myself for it, regretting my decision. I have NEVER been perfect on this journey.. I have slipped up more times than I can count but one thing I have been is CONSISTENT.....not consistent in that every day is great and every day I make all healthy decisions and workout. Not that kind of consistent. I am consistent in that every time I get off track, I get back on. Maybe not the next meal, maybe not even the next day... but I have never just QUIT. I have never said "oh well...messed this up.... might as well just forget it." 

The other night I ate at the buffet... I did okay... not great, not terrible. Last night, as I mentioned on Facebook, I had a little too much pizza.... but as I zipped up that size 4 dress in the dressing room today with room to spare, I had to shake my head and laugh, which led me to this blog.

How many times have I slipped up? How many times have I over eaten? How many times have I missed workouts? Drank too much wine? How many times have I felt negative feelings towards that day's decisions??? .....

Want to know the answer?

I don't know how many times...

what I do know is that I have eaten more healthy foods in the past 2.5 years than I have in my life. I know I've burnt more calories in one workout than I used to burn in any given 6 months of workouts. I know that I am running laps around the old me that sat on the couch.  I know that my good days and my good food decisions have outweighed the bad ones by a long shot..... and while I'm on that topic, I am TIRED of referring to food as "good" and "bad" so this is the last time it's going down like that.

All I am trying to say is that I have kicked myself in the rear end more times than I can count - for WHAT?? ....Not sure the answer to that question but what I do know is that I am now learning to TRUST THE JOURNEY and working on.............. living.

It's not easy. I've been here before and I have a long road ahead of me, I'm sure... but I am tired of feeling bad about myself because of FOOD.... what does food say about the type of person that I am? What does a too full tummy say about how much I love myself or my family or the people around me? What does a missed workout say about my faith in God? What does too many calories or points say about how much I give back to others? What does a little extra dessert say about the kind of mother that I am?

NOT A DAMN THING.

I am Krystle Joy Bailey.
I am mommy. 
I am KJB.
I am Skinny Jeans Dreams.

and I am worthy of being ALL of that and loving ALL of me ALL of the time. No matter what.

the same goes for y o u.